If You Were A Hippopotamus...

[night faerie]

If You Were A Hippopotamus...


You wouldnt be our friend. Because you couldnt type with really big toes.

[JEDIWAN]

:eyebrow: :umm: :confused: :( :grumbles: :confused: :kill:

[Amelia]

but I could use my use my tusk to type!

[Mesaana]

If I were a hippo I wouldn't have tusks I dunna think... but 4 teeth!! And a tutu to ballet dance in ;)

[JEDIWAN]

Annamaniacs much?

[Amelia]

If I were a hippo I wouldn't have tusks I dunna think... but 4 teeth!! And a tutu to ballet dance in ;)


DOH!!! I confused hippo with rhinocerous! :blush:

**flees**

[Anita Blake]

if i were a hippo i'd happily wallow in mud. actually... come to think of it....

[jabbernaut]

If I were a hippopotamus, I would be able to hold my breath for a really long time and take my naps underwater.

[BuzzMoo]

I tell you, Hippos are no joke! I had the longest conversation with a new South-african friend the other night.. they mess people up, on land! And they're super fast.

Hold me :(

[night faerie]

If you were a hippopotamus:

.... people would always be mistaking you for a rhino. :dozey:

[Apoc]

If you were a hippopotamus...

you'd fancy Barney ;)

[dark fuschia]

yeah I heard they are the biggest killer of tourists to Africa. Or maybe the biggest killer of people in general. Or they kill more people than lions. Or snakes... well it was something about being big and killing.

[QuirkyTemplate]

i was thinking that if I were a hippopotamus, I'd eat babies like Mike Tyson, only for real. which is one reason why I'm glad I'm not a hippopotamus. i got enough heat from the law without a baby-eating rap confusing matters.

[Nachtnoir]

If I were a hippopatamus, my co-workers would flee in terror when I cam into the office.....wait, they already do that....NM :D :p

[Waffles]

If I was a hippopotamus, I'd sit on the roof and eat cake.

[Dregs]

If I were a hippopotamus, I couldn't go to the cricket, because people would sing songs about eating pies to me.

[Malcor Sylverwood]

I think I might already be...

~pats belly~

-Malcor "Hungry, hungry" Sylverwood

[Byrn]

Hip hop...Hip Hop anonymous?

[Alexia]

If I were a hippopotamus and still wanted to come here, I'd simply enslave one of you and force you to type for me. Then I would retire to my luxury beachhouse and sip pink lemonade. :blush:

[Amelia]

If you were a hippopotamus:

.... people would always be mistaking you for a rhino. :dozey:

HEY NOW!!! :blush:

You will never let me forget this will you?

**flees**

[Vivacia]

If I were a hippopotomus, I'd make it my life's work to kill and eat Steve Irwin.

[Waffles]

If I were a hippopotomus, I'd make it my life's work to kill and eat Steve Irwin.
You KNOW... if he wasn't so mean to me when I was a kid, I'd be mightily offended right now... MIGHTILY!

[Amelia]

You KNOW... if he wasn't so mean to me when I was a kid, I'd be mightily offended right now... MIGHTILY!

Ok Im going to take the bait. How was Steve Irwin mean to you as a kid?

[Waffles]

Ok Im going to take the bait. How was Steve Irwin mean to you as a kid?
Um, hello? He's my second cousin... when I was a child and he was a teenager he kept on being mean to me... dunking me in the billabong... putting baby crocs in my sand pit... he was a total bully!

[jabbernaut]

If we were all hippopotamuses....

We'd be the prettiest and most handsome hippopotamuses ever. :)

[PirateBooty]

if i were a hippopotamus it would take a really long time to brush and floss all of my huge block teeth

[Amelia]

If I were a hippopatamus I would be more exciting than the two I saw at the San Diego zoo who just floated and didnt move!

[Cypher]

I wouldn't ;)

[Vivacia]

Um, hello? He's my second cousin... when I was a child and he was a teenager he kept on being mean to me... dunking me in the billabong... putting baby crocs in my sand pit... he was a total bully!

Are you serious? Steve is your second cousin? Wow. I actually think he's pretty cool, I'm just a bit tired of him. I can only stand him in small doses now. Navahli however...she practically worships him. So you better watch out...once she reads this you may have some residual croc hunter worship rub off on YOU! :p

[Jennifer]

Hip hop...Hip Hop anonymous?

LOL


Um, hello? He's my second cousin... when I was a child and he was a teenager he kept on being mean to me... dunking me in the billabong... putting baby crocs in my sand pit... he was a total bully!

Did you figure out how to spell his name correctly yet? :p

[Amelia]

Whenever I see this thread I keep hearing the title verse of a song. The title was

If I were a moose and you were a cow.
Would you love me anyhow?

It was a cute song and it made me laugh and I always remember that short period of my life, laughing over a silly little song whenever I see this. Kinda nice.

[PirateBooty]

everytime i see this thread i think about PT Cruisers.....striking resemblance, is there not????

[Waffles]

Did you figure out how to spell his name correctly yet? :p
~glares~

You, me, closet, now :p

[Colin]

If I were a hippopotamus, I'd want people to say what specie I belonged to in French, because l'hippopotame is my favorite French word. (with a close 2nd and 3rd being trottoir and quelquefois ;))

[Nachtnoir]

~glares~

You, me, closet, now :p

Now I am jealous :p

[Amelia]

Now I am jealous :p


**shoves Nacht into closet with Waffles and Jenn**

**shoves hippo in closet also**

had to keep it on topic somehow!

[SonoftheSands]

Amelia's Moose Song

If I were a moose and you were a cow
Would you love me anyhow?
Would you introduce me to your folks
Would you tell your friends, "No moose jokes!"
If I were a moose and you were a cow

Would you invite me to your club
And risk a cruel bovine snub
Would you lead me down the receiving line
And boldly boast, "This moose is mine!"

Would your parents watch us graze
Shake their heads, "It's just a phase"
Or would they thank the stars above
Their precious heifer's found her love?

Would your grandparents change their will?
They'd really expected a Holstein bull
"For this we toiled before the plow
You bring home someone who's not even a cow

"There's lots of proper stock around
Like that nice young Guernsey at Farmer Brown's
Or that last one we ridiculed and cursed
On second thought you could do worse

"But if you think this thing will last
Could he learn to moo and eat our grass
Shed his antlers in the dirt
Could you persuade him to convert?"

If our anatomies did not quite fit
Would you make the best of it
Would you nuzzle up so near
And hum sweet cow tunes in my ear?

Or would you sadly break it off
When all the hillside sneered and scoffed
"You know these moose are all the same
They're lazy, they're stupid, they come from Maine"

It's true things slip a moose's mind
That cows remember all the time
Bulbous nose and knobby knees
A coat that harbors ticks and fleas

But a moose can be a handy thing
When hungry wolves come visiting
In icy gust of winter storm
Our fur is deep and dry and warm

And someday should your milk run dry
And farmer stare with baleful eye
In dead of night I'd slip your noose
And lead you home to the land of moose
If I were a moose and you were a cow

If hunters came to do me harm
Would you hide me in the barn
Would all the herd come on the run
And glare until they dropped their guns?

Might you permit a goodnight kiss
Could you learn to love wet MOOSE LIPS?
If I were a moose and you were a cow
If you were a cow and I were a moose

[Amelia]

I love you SotS!

**toussels SotS hair**

[jabbernaut]

If I were a hippopotamus, I'd get a great big "Mother" tattoo right on my big ol' hippo hind end.

[Lilith]

hippos??? how cute!!! :love:

~pats all the hippos~

[Anita Blake]

if you were a cow moose, i'd take your picture and put it on the quill. :D


..and this is what you'd look like.
(this is at my mom's house)

[ChronoDmin]

I would not be a hippo i'd be the crocdile trying to woo the hippo

[Alexia]

That is a HUGE ass. :D

[ChronoDmin]

That is a HUGE ass. :D

:eek: rofl

[Corvus Corax]

If you were a hippo.......





....I'd be the walrus, goo goo g' joob

[Amos]

If You Were A Hippopotamus...
i wish people would stop saying things like that to me. "you know james if you were a hippo we wuldn't be in this mess right now" and "damnit james that's the worst underwater dive i've ever seen, we'll never get into the olympics with you on the team. now if you were a hippopotamus..." and so on. *throws crocodiles at all smug smarmy hippos"

[Alexia]

Oh my word! It's James! :eek:

*is hit with a crocodile and faints*

[Radar]

Umm James, ~points to croc latched to his head~ i think this belongs to you

[Lyle]

you really are a lousy hippo, james. tell me, have you ever tried...Not being a hippo?

All the cool kids are doing it these days.

[Amos]

*mocks lyle for no good reason*

are you at the library? cos i was just there when i made that post :D btw mister toshiba is alive and kicking once more

[Waffles]

*mocks lyle for no good reason*

are you at the library? cos i was just there when i made that post :D btw mister toshiba is alive and kicking once more
:eek: :eek:

~is also hit with flying crocs~

You know, I'm with Anita atm... and when I told her that you were back, she squealed with joy and clapped her hands. I think you made her really happy. Oh yeah, I missed ya too ;)

[Amos]

i missed you guys too :) like this much: *points to the stars*

*hugs all round*

sorry 'bout the crocs, but it's a bit late now, especially since the hippos ate steve irwin.

[SonoftheSands]

*waves to James* Don't worry about being a Hippopotamus James. Just do whatever comes naturally to you and I'm certain it will be brilliant (even if is is just wallowing in the mud)

[Anita Blake]

:eek: :eek:

~is also hit with flying crocs~

You know, I'm with Anita atm... and when I told her that you were back, she squealed with joy and clapped her hands. I think you made her really happy. Oh yeah, I missed ya too ;)

hey! i resemble that remark! and it wasn't so much a squeal as a dignified cheer! ~is very dignified~ :umm: yeah.... that's it...

:D :p

[Radar]

~clears throat~ everyone sing along

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas
Words and music by John Rox
performed by Gayla Peevey (1953)

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
Don't want a doll, no dinky Tinker Toy
I want a hippopotamus to play with and enjoy

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
I don't think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won't have to use our dirty chimney flue
Just bring him through the front door,
that's the easy thing to do

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see a hippo hero standing there

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinoceroses
I only like hippopotamuses
And hippopotamuses like me too

Mom says the hippo would eat me up, but then
Teacher says a hippo is a vegeterian

There's lots of room for him in our two-car garage
I'd feed him there and wash him there and give him his massage

I can see me now on Christmas morning,
creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy and what surprise
when I open up my eyes
to see a hippo hero standing there

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles or rhinoceroseses
I only like hippopotamuseses
And hippopotamuses like me too!

[JEDIWAN]

heh heh. Getting an Alley McBeal flashback...

Anywho...

If I were a hippoptamus, I would gather a select few hippoptami, and create a game. The likes of which would signify, and perhaps cause, our...HUNGER...

[Vivacia]

If I were a hippopotamus...after I'd eaten steve Irwin, I'd go on a rampage and eat Steve Austin and Jeff Corwin too. :)

[navahli]

If I were a hippopotamus...after I'd eaten steve Irwin, I'd go on a rampage and eat Steve Austin and Jeff Corwin too. :)
Hey Sis! You know how I feel about Steve Irwin!!

I f I were a Hippo I'd be feeling more at ease becouse no one would bother me!! and I wouldnt have to work....

[dark fuschia]

oooh how do you feel about Steve Irwin? I always found him rather entertaining. Tehe, I don't get the aussies who are ashamed of him. He's hilareous!

[Vivacia]

Navahli worships the ground Steve walks on. I still like him, but not as much as I used to. By crikie he can be annoying! He's very good at what he does, but it's gotten a little old.

[navahli]

I still love Steve Irwin and respect the work he and the team at Aussie Zoo has done for consevation and education about animals around the world. and yea he is crazy and entertaining to watch

[Lilith]

ok, i have to ask... who the hec is steve irwin??? :umm:

~feels stupid asking, since everyone else seems to know~ :dozey:

[Malcor Sylverwood]

This guy... ;)

[Dregs]

I still love Steve Irwin and respect the work he and the team at Aussie Zoo has done for consevation and education about animals around the world. and yea he is crazy and entertaining to watch
I think I speak for us all when I saw pffffffffffffffffffffffffffffft

[Amos]

you're better off watching russell coight's all aussie adventures. he's way funnier, and at least you know for certain that russell's gonna get hurt, whereas with steve you can only wait and hope.

[Alexia]

Well I think Steve is a nice person.

*cue defiant flicking of hair and 'holier than thou' look*

[Vivacia]

Steve is a very nice person. So is Terri. And Bindi is adorable. baby Bob is cute too. I just got so tired of watching Steve not get bit! He's a little preachy and with me he's preaching to the choir. Like I said...he's great in small doses. I've never heard of Russell Coight. Is he on in America?

[Alexia]

I don't think Russel Coight is on in America. Yet?

[Amelia]

I sometimes want to push Steve Irwin into the crocks mouth......just to see what he would do.

[ChronoDmin]

I sometimes want to push Steve Irwin into the crocks mouth......just to see what he would do.


you know why he doesn't get bit?... he pays those crocs off i tell ya.....we neeed our own gator that on our payroll then we could have some fun amelia... hey Jabb your a florida boy .. how bout getting us a gator? :)

[Nachtnoir]

you know why he doesn't get bit?... he pays those crocs off i tell ya.....we neeed our own gator that on our payroll then we could have some fun amelia... hey Jabb your a florida boy .. how bout getting us a gator? :)

Naw, next October, we can go down to the bayou when we are in NOLA and pick one out ourselves. The cajun gators are more mean too.

<as yet not available devil emote>

[Amelia]

I went to a swamp preserve in NOLA. This Senior Chief really loves the swamp. It was cool there was this HUGE alligator and he was sitting in the island in the river and his tail was so long it went into the water and there was leafy stuff growing on his back. I would say lets get him but I dont know if he (the alligator) would move fast enough.

[Waffles]

Um, you really should be asking us Aussies... when Dregs and I were in the scouts, you got a badge for being able to wrestle and handle crocs... Though we only really wrestled small ones, for safety reasons. I'm just pissed off about those new regulations which means scouts nowadays can't get that badge. Bah... stupid Billy Thompson getting mauled... :grumbles:

[Vivacia]

If I were a hippopotamus, I'd be in Africa and I'd be warm and full of Australian naturalists.